Finding Out What Will Happen

   "Anyone can find out what will happen," 

Aslan said to the children as he shook his great mane.  

"Get up at once and follow me.  What will happen?  

There is only one way of finding out."

                                                                                         --C.S. Lewis in Prince Caspian
 
   I am glad I found that quote today.  I am still at home.  I am tired of always being tired.  I seem to have taken a step backward today just in how I feel.  I talk about how I want to live a day at a time, but I get impatient, expecting that each day will be better than the one before.  When that day-by-day improvement wanes, I get impatient and angry.  I want to be better.  But I am asked to just follow.  I am not asked to set the pace, to make the plans, to form the timetable.  I am asked to follow.  This is not an easy thing since I want to be in control of all of this damnable cancer and its nasty side effects.  But then I don't really have the choice.  Will tomorrow be better than today?  Will I ever really be cured or in remission or better?  Will I run and jump and dance and climb and backpack and laugh without giving this experience a second thought?
   What will happen?  There is only one way of finding out.  Let's go!